Nothing new on my sister. But now my brother, who is on the kidney transplant list, is in the hospital with cardiac blockages. One is 40-50% blocked. The other one is 90% blocked. I’m looking at the fact that they didn’t rush him into surgery as a positive thing. Even so, if you need me I’ll be in the corner trying to hold myself together.
This decade has been a rough one for my family. My father passed in 2010, my brother-in-law in 2011, my sister passed away in 2016, and my mom passed last year. I thought we would get a break until the 2020s. I was wrong. My sister had a CT Scan on her lungs and the doctor has found something “concerning.”
I’m so scared right now. I can’t lose anyone else in my family. So, please send whatever prayers, good thoughts, positivity, whatever you can, to my sister. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that whatever they think they’ve found can be treated. I’ll keep you all posted on what we find out.
Much gratitude to you all. Meg
Greetings all,
Just a quick note and update. I haven’t been posting because I hurt my shoulder over 4th of July weekend and I’ve been on light duty ever since. Which means the only typing I’ve been doing is for work. Otherwise, things here are going well.
My cat Patches is still hanging in there, and his last blood work was normal for the most part. The vet was astonished to see him doing so well. I guess he’s just not ready to give up his ninth life. J
Summer’s flying by, and my family is getting ready for my niece’s wedding in September. She honored me by asking me to be her Maid of Honor, so I’m pretty excited about that.
I hope everyone out there is doing well and having a wonderful summer.
The strong ones are the ones who have
Learned how to break.
From break-ups to breakdowns
To break-ins
Where people have unexpectedly stolen
Our hearts.
We have felt ourselves crumble
Into dust.
At risk of being blown away
By the changing winds of our lives.
Yet time and time again we
Glue ourselves back together again.
Hope, faith, and tears create an emotional cement
That strengthens the remaining cracks in our psyches.
We rise over and over again from the ashes like Phoenixes.
Reborn, recreated and restored.
This little guy has used up one of his lives. The vet said he probably had a blood clot and his full recovery and regaining the use of his back legs is remarkable. He’s doing great again. I feel so lucky to have been given at least a little more time with him.
Funny story: Last night I checked up on him and he looked at me like, “I’m fine, mom. You can quit checking on me every half hour.” 🤣🤣
Major life events become
Rubber bands wrapped
Around our life time.
As time passes
It can stretch
To make it
Seem like forever
And when it relaxes
The event
No matter how long ago
Seems like mere days
Have gone by.
Years may pass
Before the band
Loses its elasticity
And the event eases
Itself into real time.
Until that happens,
Humanity is stuck
In a limbo of
Push and pull
On our conscious memory.
Time seems to move fast
And slow all at once.
And we just drift with it.
One year ago today, my mom went into the hospital, for what would turn out to be, the last time. It’s another one of those firsts that I’ve had to face since my mom passed. I’m running out of time to have those first moments though. In five weeks it will be a year since she died. That in and of itself seems impossible. That day, her last in this house seems so long ago, yet it seems like it happened last week — such a strange sensation, to bounce from one distance of time to another. Somehow, I’ve found the strength to get through my first summer without her, the first fall, her birthday, holidays, all without her here. There have been moments of unbelievable pain and moments of peace where I’ve found some kind of acceptance. Even though pure acceptance has yet to materialize in my heart, I still can’t believe she’s gone and in some ways, now that so much time has passed, I can. And back and forth I go.
Stretching of the mind
To accommodate new ways
To look at the world.
The overwhelming
Feeling that forever melts
All hearts and reason.
The world’s so quiet
Now that the howling is gone
I revel in peace
My supervisor messaged me a little while ago. She wants me to finish out my internship so they can start giving me paid work! I did it!! 🎉🎉🎉