The Strong Ones Break

The strong ones are the ones who have

Learned how to break.

From break-ups to breakdowns

To break-ins

Where people have unexpectedly stolen

Our hearts.

We have felt ourselves crumble

Into dust.

At risk of being blown away

By the changing winds of our lives.

Yet time and time again we

Glue ourselves back together again.

Hope, faith, and tears create an emotional cement

That strengthens the remaining cracks in our psyches.

We rise over and over again from the ashes like Phoenixes.

Reborn, recreated and restored.

If It Fits, I Sits

I got a box in the mail

Just the other day

Scissors revealed the contents

The rest was thrown away.

Just as I thought it was finished

That it was all said and done.

A loud whiny meow from behind me came

And cat and box become one.

When he first started to climb

Into the box so small

I had to stand and laugh at him

He couldn’t fit at all.

But then the cat gave me look

And though no words were said

He communicated that he would fit

And the box would be his new bed.

I watched his bones begin to melt

He impossibly liquefied

And as the cat scrunched himself in

I laugh until I cried.

The moral of the story

Before this poem, I quit

In cat-dom it’s entirely true

If a cat fits, it sits.

Life’s Rubber Band

Major life events become

Rubber bands wrapped

Around our life time.

As time passes

It can stretch

To make it

Seem like forever

And when it relaxes

The event

No matter how long ago

Seems like mere days

Have gone by.

Years may pass

Before the band

Loses its elasticity

And the event eases

Itself into real time.

Until that happens,

Humanity is stuck

In a limbo of

Push and pull

On our conscious memory.

Time seems to move fast

And slow all at once.

And we just drift with it.

 

One year ago today, my mom went into the hospital, for what would turn out to be, the last time. It’s another one of those firsts that I’ve had to face since my mom passed. I’m running out of time to have those first moments though. In five weeks it will be a year since she died. That in and of itself seems impossible. That day, her last in this house seems so long ago, yet it seems like it happened last week — such a strange sensation, to bounce from one distance of time to another. Somehow, I’ve found the strength to get through my first summer without her, the first fall, her birthday, holidays, all without her here. There have been moments of unbelievable pain and moments of peace where I’ve found some kind of acceptance. Even though pure acceptance has yet to materialize in my heart, I still can’t believe she’s gone and in some ways, now that so much time has passed, I can. And back and forth I go.

A Brief Resurfacing

I’ve surfaced for a moment to take a breath and wanted to update everyone. I’m still plugging away on my internship, which is going very well. I’m almost halfway through, and have been getting some very positive feedback on my work, so fingers crossed there’s a job offer in the near future. As difficult and stressful as this internship has proven to be I am so grateful to have this opportunity to gain experience and get a taste of what is to come in my new career. Once things calm down, I’m definitely planning on returning to a more regular posting schedule on my blog. I have some things planned that I hope you all will enjoy. Well, better dive back into it.  Hope you all are doing well, and I send you much love.

The Ice-Covered Yard

My dog stands rooted to the

Spot where he stands.

I have called him

But in his mind

He can’t obey.

His usually verdant yard

Is now covered

In splotchy grey ice.

Some primal instinct

Is speaking to him.

Telling him not to go across.

The hard frozen surface.

I watch him and feel

His mind working.

Looking right and left

He finally finds

His way back to me

And jumps up,

Pleased with himself

And this reunion.